Wednesday, March 21, 2018
Forgive! It's Good For You.
If you want to get to heaven, you need to forgive just as you have been forgiven. That's Biblical truth. However, even the Mayo Clinic says it's good for you. (https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/forgiveness/art-20047692) Holding onto a grudge is likely to raise your blood pressure, make you depressed, and ruin your enjoyment of the good things in life.
I know a bit about forgiveness. I've been married for forty-one years. I have forgiven hubby many times for various infractions of perfection and hubby has forgiven me, too. I've forgiven parents, children, and plenty of other people for things they did or said. Fortunately, for the most part, they've forgiven me as well, because sometimes I've said or done some really stupid stuff.
For instance, when we first moved into our present home, there was a really ugly, shag rug in the family room. It had a geometric pattern of orange, brown, and off-white. I didn't like the colors. I didn't like the pattern. Most of all, I hated the shaggy surface. It was difficult to keep clean with three young children running around.
However, hubby thought it was fine. In addition, he was worried about finances and didn't want to spend any money on a new rug. I figured there was tile underneath the rug. There had to be. The kitchen had an off-white tile and the family room was right off the kitchen. I could live with tile. It's easy to clean. Still, hubby did not want to rip up the old rug.
Around that time, hubby's parents came to visit with us and get to know their grandchildren. They didn't know about our rug argument. That same week, hubby had to go on a business trip. While he was gone, I asked his parents to help me rip up the rug, which they did. Underneath the rug was an ugly black and white asphalt tile floor, not the simple off-white I expected. It was hideous, but I shrugged and figured I could at least keep it clean.
The garbage collectors carted the old rug away. Hubby's parents left to return home.
Hubby came back from his business trip. He was really, really angry when he realized the rug wasn't there anymore. He didn't talk to me for about a week. One of our good friends laughed and said he probably wouldn't have talked to me for a month if I had ordered a new rug.
But eventually, hubby let it go. While I was not fond of black and white tile, I didn't ask for a replacement. A long time afterward, we bought beige ceramic tile. Hubby and I replaced the black and white tile on our own. It was a lot of work, but that floor is still there and blessedly easy to clean.
Should I have ripped up the rug? Should hubby have been a little more willing to compromise? Probably, but we are both stubborn. Nevertheless, we managed to get over it. And that's the way it has to be. Forgiveness is healthy, it keeps marriages together, and it's what the Lord expects from all of us because He forgave us first.